Author: Haydee Montemayor

The Most Important Invitation You’ll Ever Receive is the Invitation to Talk About Love

Dear Friend,

I’m writing to invite you to talk about love as often as you can, with as many people as you can.

How: Talk about love when you communicate verbally, nonverbally, to yourself and to others, whether they look like you, talk like you, feel like you, love like you, believe in what you believe or not. Of course, you’ll have to stand up for yourself from time to time, but even when you do, do so from a place of love

Time: You’re free to talk about love as often as you can, you’re free to live in the vibration of love, and therefore act in loving ways with those around you even more often than you do right now

Place: Talk about love or communicate with love everywhere, without dwelling on the fact that it might be the unpopular thing to do.

What we’re Celebrating: The reason I’m encouraging you to talk about love is to inspire you to make a shift in all the areas of your life and of our world at large by focusing on and acting from a place of love.

When you love, you feel good. When you act from love, you do good. Both benefit the world.
When you deliberately seek to feel good, without harming the people around you or harming yourself, you attract to you an infinite amount of blessings which you in turn can give to others.
You feeling good brings wellbeing, grace, illumination, hope and faith to those around you.
When people are inspired to explore their highest potential, imagine all the positive change that can come from it.

If you want to read about 5 reasons why having a conversation about love is super important, read my prior post.

Why we’re Celebrating: Love is the answer that many of us seek, but cannot see. It’s what we ask for, and do not answer the door when it knocks. With love at our core, we can literally change our life, change the dynamic of our interlinked lives and change the world. It is worth repeating that love makes us feel good. And when we feel good, we don’t seek to be fulfilled by things that leave us feeling more empty and strip the world of its inherent joy. When we feel feel good, we’re more willing to serve, to create, to uplift to inspire.

If you accept this invitation to talk about love, perhaps I don’t physically see you putting love into practice, but some way, some how, I’ll feel the energy that YOU helped make more loving. Incrementally, the world will start to talk about love thanks to you. The world, or at least your world, will realize the importance of love, how we’ve taken it for granted, and what a powerful force it is to shift our ability to create a better life for ourselves by simply following our bliss, as Joseph Campbell so eloquently inspired us to do. When we watch the news or anything that perpetuates negativity we consciously or unconsciously fixate on the negative, and therefore increase our creation of more negativity. Totally not what we’re after is it? 🙂 Besides, all the tragedies in the world will not help us shape our loving world, as I stated in a prior post, it’s easier to learn lessons the easy way, such as through love, than the hard way, often expressed as tragedy.

So join me in spreading the importance of love in the best way that reflects your talent. Acting loving in as many circumstances as possible may seem like the weak thing to do when there seems to be so much danger, adversity and negativity in the world… but remember that the world is as you see it. If you believe in love, and spread love, love is what will abound in your life. Throughout history, Martin Luther King, Jr., and Mother Teresa have believed in love without limits… and notice how their efforts live on. Nowadays, you have sublime people like Dr. Wayne Dyer, Deepak Chopra, Oprah, and Louise Hay that believe in love like I believe in love and I’m sure you do too. Together, famous or not, when we talk about love, we can really make the difference… and making the difference through love, is what this blog is about.

So please join me, in spreading love in the way that feels the most joyous to you. You don’t have to R.S.V.P. and you’re free, or rather encouraged, to bring a friend with you along on this journey. 🙂 All I ask is that you leave a comment below stating why you are interested in joining me.

Why It’s Absolutely Unnecessary to Suffer Greater Tragedies Before Appreciating Life and Love

When something negative happens to someone as a result of what we consider a decision based on poor judgement, we often say “Hopefully, he/she learned his/her lesson,” sometimes sincerely, sometimes judgmentally. We also say, “I’ve learned my lesson,” often as a last resort when all is said and done and when we can’t change what’s happened. Our solace and consolation after a challenging life event, oftentimes is that we do learn. Sooner or later, we understand what life is trying to tell us. However, have you ever wondered if in fact we need to suffer greater tragedies or go through something truly difficult before we learn?

Is Life a Fair Test or Does it Just Want to Fail Us?

I don’t know about you, but I would much prefer to learn via a positive experience, somebody else’s negative experience, intuition, common sense or life’s little hints that something is off. And we do get those, it’s like someone throwing a cotton ball at us to grab our attention, then a pebble, then a stone, then a brick, until finally, if we have not paid attention or done anything about this situation, the whole brick wall comes tumbling down on us.

What Lesson Do You Want to Learn, the Easy Way?

The number 1 thing I would like to learn how to do very well, without any tragedies attempting to teach me any so-called lessons, is to appreciate life and love even more than I do. It is through this appreciation that I can show my love to others, be truly present for them and be truly present in our life to enjoy this gift called life.

What do you want to learn, the kind way? If you stop to really think about it, what type of lessons has life taught you recently? How to value family more, friends more, money, job, health, freedom or something else? What kind of “grades” have you gotten in each of these areas? Do you need life to test you rigorously in your worst-performing areas in order for you to “prove” that you’ve learned what you need to learn? So, knowing what you want to learn, and the fact that you most likely don’t want to learn things the hard way, why is it that many of us wait until someone dies, we get divorced, we file for bankruptcy, we lose a family member, we lose our friend, we lose our child’s respect, or we lose our health, we lose the ability to enjoy the simple blessing that we have at our disposal each day, or we’re about to lose our life before we show that we truly care about that which we lost or about to lose? What on earth are we waiting for? That may depend on your circumstances and your mentality, but you want to know the ultimate lesson that life is probably wanting to teach all of us? That we shouldn’t take things for granted. Nothing is a given. We “deserve” nothing. We’re entitled to nothing. That promotion, that vacation, that salary, the car, the cruise… isn’t yours forever. Nothing, belongs to us. As trite at it may seem, we really do need to value the presents in our present while they last. Now, the point here isn’t to become paranoid… the point here is to become truly joyful and loving… NOW, when it TRULY matters. Of course, some of these life events where we experience loss are inevitable and sometimes, as hard as they may be initially, they’re even the best thing for the people involved, but if we’re feeling guilty or remorseful about whom or what we lost, it probably means that at some point, we weren’t appreciating or treasuring to the degree that we wanted to or that we know the other person needed.

Those degrees of separation between being at peace with something and not being at peace, is what hurts— it’s what damages us, and it’s what traumatizes us. We feel we were so close, and yet we were so far.

While there are times when we can say with quite a bit of conviction that we’re the victim of our circumstances, most of the time we’re not the victim– we are the conscious or subconscious perpetrator of our life circumstance. Most situations that result in us hurting, came about because we took the important things in life for granted. This brings us to the question, if we know that it’s absolutely unnecessary to suffer greater tragedies before appreciating life and love, why do we not act like we know this? Is it because it takes more courage to love, be present, be active, be involved, than it does to experience the pain that we get if we distance ourselves from whom and what we love? That’s a question truly worth exploring. In other words, why do you subconsciously or consciously allow the tragedy to happen before you act? After all, if we care enough about ourselves and we take a moment to listen to ourselves, our feelings, and sense our intuition, you can almost immediately pinpoint what’s wrong with your life. Maybe “wrong” is to harsh of a word. You can pinpoint where you’re not interacting with life and with others to the degree that you would like and where you can appreciate life and love more. You may choose to ignore this awareness, but that’s your decision and it doesn’t mean that your feeling is not there, or that it’ll go away just because you don’t want to deal with it.

Waiting for a tragedy to strike so that you can “confirm” what you already know is an utter waste of time and of your potential.”

If you know that a job is going nowhere or a relationship is going nowhere, then, what are you waiting for?!

In life, we meet, court, go after, and eventually “marry” situations that we think we want. However, we can often feel it inside ourselves if what we’re going after is worth it, or if it isn’t. Yet for some absurd reason, we think we have to complete the cycle with everyone and everything. Let’s face it, not everyone and everything is deserving of this great commitment of ours. But yet, we choose to not do something about the dissatisfaction that we’re experiencing. That’s why there are unhappy strangers celebrating their 40 year anniversary; there are people who died today who never fulfilled their dreams because they were too busy being responsible; most of us live with junk that we bought which we’ll never use; and there are unhappy, unfulfilled and overwhelmed parents raising unhappy, unfulfilled and overwhelmed children. Worse yet, we often don’t realize that in our pursuit of following everything that doesn’t matter or that doesn’t provide us with true happiness, we plague our world with joylessness. How sad! Can you see how this emotional, physical, mental, and spiritual baggage that we’re carrying around is insane, something that affects us all and will continue to affect the generations to come unless we wake up and practice true love and true appreciation with one another and with our collective world? Of course you can see this!

You are an A+ student in this school of life, so for the love of anything or anyone you think is worth loving, don’t wait to fail another of life’s “grueling tests” so that you can become “enlightened” after-the-fact, to do what you know you should do today.“

Be the great friend
Be the loving parent
Be the caring spouse
Be the bold entrepreneur
Be the one who gives time lovingly and generously
Be the one who gives a damn about the hunger and poverty in the world
Be the one who questions the garbage we’re teaching our youth and falling for ourselves
Be the one who takes care of your wellbeing– YOU are your best doctor
Be the one who believes in your dreams- no matter how unrealistic they are or seem
Be the one who makes your dreams happen so that we can all continue dreaming

You have such a full and rich life already regardless of what’s going on, that despite what the world may think and what you may have foolishly accepted, you don’t need a guest called “Tragedy” in your life. Trust me, been there, done that… you really don’t. If by chance, Tragedy does come, make sure that you are living today in such a way, that due to the enormous amount of love you give, that loving people can help, console, support and ease your pain during an inevitable tragedy. If nothing else, make sure that your mentality attracts as much positivity into your life as it can and is able to deal effectively and efficiently with Tragedy. If it must, let it come in, accept it’s offering, which is usually a lesson that you already knew, and quickly show it the door so that it can exit. Dwell on love and appreciation because ultimately, your circumstances are filled with trivial details trying to teach you what the important lessons of life are.

Share Your Wisdom Treasures

So after analyzing whether you personally do or don’t need tragedies in your life to learn about what matters in life, what proactive measures, if any, are you willing to take to demonstrate that you know the lesson?

5 Do-Or-Die Reasons Why Having a Conversation About Love is Important

What Is Your Life Full Of?

It only takes a glimpse of your to-do list, your social media presence, your calendar, your conflicting appointments and the world at large to know that your life is overflowing. It’s full of commitments, full of errands, and the term “scatter-brain” should be your affectionate nickname.

In the grand scheme of things, however, IS your life full? Do all of the things that fill up your to-do list, your social media profiles, your calendar, your time, your life, your heart, your mind and your soul fill you up? Really fill you up? If they don’t, you’re absolutely not alone. There are billions of people who feel this exact same way. We’re focusing on the ingredients of life… the minutia, instead of focusing on the celebration of life cake. We can even throw the cake out of this scenario and know that it’s absolutely enough to just be in the present. But when are we present? Where are we right now? As you know, we are everywhere but here. We are literally, mentally, psychologically and spiritually scattered. Therefore, we are hardly ever present to enjoy our life. You know what also is sad? That we expect to enjoy our life and have joy based on our external circumstances, instead of our internal ones. We’re not valuable because of how many things we checked off our to-do list, how many friends we have on social media, how many people like what we say on social media or how many social invitations we get each weekend. There’s so much more to you than that.

If you really observe your life, you’ll discover that:

“It’s not that you can’t keep up with your to-do list. It’s that your to-do list can’t keep up with you because your mind is constantly creating, thinking, analyzing, envisioning and realizing the hundreds of things you “have” to do.”

And the question is not where your to do list is when you’re getting an avalanche of thoughts of this kind, but where love and doing the things that matter end up. Do they even get a prime spot on your to-do list? Or your life?

What Should Your Life Be Full Of?

You are probably reading this with the hope that I have some magical answer for how to be more present and for how to feel more joy? (After all, if you’ve read this far, it’s almost like a miracle… I know you have so many things “to do” 😉 ). And as simplistic as it may seem I do have an answer that can be magical if you apply it well in all areas of your life. That answer is love.

Why Should You Start Talking About What Your Life Should Be Filled With?

Of course, how you can apply love to your life is too broad of a topic for this one post. For now, though, I want to leave you with 5 do-or-die reasons why having a conversation about love is important:

1. First of all, you need to come to terms with a perhaps rude awakening and that is that you literally have sooooo many things on your to-do list, that even if you did nothing else in life, you would probably still have plenty of things to occupy you the rest of your life. So, the concept of love, as basic or grandiose as you think it is, NEEDS to be part of your life. This means, you have to make time for it. It’s not like you can wait until the rest of your to-do list is finished, before you feel you can focus on love. You need to call the people you love, see them, spend time with them, cherish them, give them you. Give them love. And if they say that they don’t have time for some of your loving. Insist on loving. Making loving them your priority. And analyze this: Why do you think they’re so “addicted” to being busy? Have you ever considered that if they didn’t feel busy, they would probably feel empty? Have you ever considered that that’s the reason why your social calendar is that full? It’s sad and surprising to even come to terms with either one of these rationalizations. The key here is, that instead of being someone who is waiting for LOVE to knock on your door, and rescue you from your to-do list is super naive. It’s not gonna happen. There is no “Love in Shining Armor.” YOU have to create time for what matters.

2. And please, don’t give me the “But really, I don’t have time” excuse. If you find the time to gossip, to talk about the latest reality show, to obsess about cleaning, to argue, to watch sports, to watch movies, to talk about what you’re going to bring to the pot-luck, to engage in politics, to talk about or participate in office politics, the watch or talk about news, to comment on what the latest celebrity said on a social media site, then you certainly have time to make love your priority. Haven’t you heard yourself lately? Haven’t you caught yourself and heard a little voice saying, “I can’t believe I’m talking about this stupid subject” when you’re spending time with your loved ones? That’s your intuition that knows that you’re wasting time.

3. As hard as it is to admit it, you know what your intuition is reminding you of? That we’re not eternal. So either you do and say what you’re meant to say right now or at the next opportunity that the moment is “good enough” instead of waiting for the nonexistent “perfect moment” or you run the risk of never, ever, having the opportunity to say it at all. You can die today. Your loved one could die today! What are you waiting for!?

4. On a larger scale, negative energy is taking this world nowhere productive. Of course, you can say it’s taking us down, but that’s why I specified that it’s taking us nowhere productive. You have two options with every choice you make. Either you take the fear/hate route as you do something or you take the love route.

Which one do you think will take you further in life (not that we’re focusing on your needs right now)?
Which one do you think will make the best difference?
Which will allow you to leave a meaningful imprint or legacy for those that have had the privilege of knowing you and having you in their life?

I know and you know that anybody can act negatively and perpetuate fear and that they’ll instantly feel powerful doing so. That’s what cowards and wimps do. That’s the easy route. Anybody can hate easily, but not everybody can love easily. Yes, they can love, but it takes courage to love. Courage comes from the French word, “coeur” which means “heart.” If your heart keep you alive, why shouldn’t you want to keep the world of our dreams alive? And no matter how impossible it seems to be to attain it, help create it one choice at a time?

5. I hope that all of this is helping you realize that love is the topic that should be trending on your favorite social media sites. You know where else love should be trending? On your everyday day-to-day “mundane” actions, meaning in your life. You maybe think that you’re so insignificant that you choosing to live more love-consciously will not matter. But you know what? You’re wrong. Haven’t you stopped to think about the power of love? Don’t you know that if today you chose to love someone instead of being indifferent, hating or feeling any other not-so-giving feeling, that you would make a difference? You can either make a difference to that one person or (if you can think this highly of yourself) you can make a difference to the whole world. Put another way, when you make a difference to one person, you make a difference to the world. We are all energy. That’s no joke. So either you uplift our collective human consciousness or you bring it down. It’s all based on how you treat one person.

Why Should We Take the Time to Talk About and Apply Love?

We need to address what’s important in our world by talking about love. Love is the common thread and the common denominator in all of our lives. All the political issues that are driving people nuts around the world, boil down to love. Love impacts how a farmer farms and how he treats his animals. That in turn affects the energy that we receive from our nourishment and how healthy we are. Love affects whether or not a doctor does everything in his/her power to keep you or a loved one alive. Love affects our oceans, our pollution, and the people who have just died out of hunger in this short time that you read this post. Love matters to your child who needs your embrace, to your spouse that needs a caress. Love matters to the underdog, but it also matters to the CEO. Love should matter to everyone and matter a whole lot, because it is essentially our best gift, our remedy, our answer and our saving grace. Either we use love to keep our personal and collective well-being afloat, or we don’t use it and sink in misery, despair and indifference. We’ve all experienced both sides of that equation on a microscopic level in our own life and we know that we’re much kinder and much smarter than to let the latter happen, so start seeing love as a unending treasure, because it really is. Without further delay, give it away.

Now It’s Your Turn to Share Your Wisdom Gems

This blog is not my soap box. It’s a platform to honor love and converse about it. So, I’d be thrilled to hear what you have to say about it. Please share this article with your friends so that more people can join in on the conversation.

Do you think that you are ready to learn more about love? Why or why not?
Do you think the world is ready to learn more about love? Why or why not?

What do Your Photos Say and Not Say About Your Life?

Have you heard that it’s highly likely that when you pass away you will see images from your life flash before you? Does that scare you, does that excite you or are you indifferent?

If you’re not sure about what the answer to this question is, perhaps you could be open to an experiment.

To start off, let’s answer an easier, more mundane question. How long ago has it been since you uploaded the photos of your camera onto your computer?

If you’re like most people, the answer to that question is probably between 6 months to a year ago, and some people… even a couple of years ago. Typically, that’s not a good thing because if something happens to your camera… that’s months, if not yeeeears worth of precious memories that you’ve just lost… buuuuuuut for now, don’t worry. All is well.

Even Though All is Well Let’s Take Some Time to Reflect Upon What Your Photos Say About You

Take a moment to connect your camera to your computer right now. As a matter of fact, take some masking tape or make a label with the labeler maker to label that USB cable that connects your computer to your cable so that you can learn to treasure your life a little more. Think of it as your “lifeline” (you’ll read why in a minute).

Sit in a comfortable chair in front of your computer and start uploading. As you watch them flash before you, thing about this question: what do your photos say about you?

If you’re anything like most people this is what you’ll probably feel/think:

1. Woah… those picture are since my child’s last birthday. How many months has it been since I last uploaded the pictures?

2. Geesh, the camera is saying that I have thousands of photos to upload since my last upload! I can’t believe that I took this many! How is it possible to take thousands of photos? I take thousands of photos when I travel… but I’ve taken thousands of photos from ordinary moments. Maybe the ordinary moments are just as special. Plus, what would I want to look at…. a building of some sort or my loved ones’ accomplishments and celebrations?

3. Wow my child was so tiny!

4. My loved one looked different…. but great. I love them.

5. Ohh that outfit that my child/loved one was wearing was so adorable! They looked so cute in it!

6. I don’t think that my child fits into that outfit anymore. That’s so sad! They’ll never get to wear it again.

7. When was the last time that my child wore those pijamas? Was it that day that I took that picture? Oh my gosh, they’ll never get to wear that outfit again? Did I take photos of my child when he/she was wearing all of his/her cutest outfits?

8. Why aren’t there more pictures of me? Yep, I know, I know, I didn’t have more pictures taken because I didn’t want more. I thought I looked fat and/or ugly. Come to think of it, I didn’t look so bad after all. Heck, I might even look worse now. But should I have more pictures taken now… because in retrospect, I’m looking better now than I will in the future?

9. My child does look adorable when he/she cries. I can’t believe I’m even saying that!

10. My baby’s way of playing and asking for my attention is adorable. Am I always a responsive parent?

11. Whatever I bake or cook looks pretty, I should bake/cook more often.

12. I have been meaning to upload those pictures to my social media site. They would help somebody with this type of project.

13. My child’s messes look adorable. I shouldn’t have minded cleaning it up.

14. Perhaps I should hang or store my camera closer to my computer so that I can upload photos more often. The cable connecting my computer and my camera really is a lifeline that should invite me to do two things.

#1- Treasure my family while they’re alive immensely and see each moment as something special and as a gift.
#2- Regardless of how much or of how little you’re enjoying your life… uploading pictures should remind you of how fast time really does go by and how you have to be even more aware, more thankful, and more conscious of how the day to day living affects your quality of life and that of your loved ones.

Nowadays, we download pictures for the world to see. Yet what they see or don’t see is irrelevant. Their perception of you doesn’t matter. Your perception of yourself should matter. So instead of investing lots of time downloading a photo that portrays you in the best light, download the photos from your camera to your computer and take a moment to analyze them. Appreciate them. Relive them. All for the purpose of really analyzing visually what is going on in your life.

1) Are you and your significant other still making an effort to have photos where both of you come out or do you each come out on your photos, solo?

2) Will you miss not snapping a photo of you hugging your kids… all because you think you don’t look good enough?

3) What occasions do you think are worth preserving?

4) Is taking pictures a chore or a joy?

If you’re very, very honest, almost brutally honest with yourself, you’ll probably remember as you’re watching your pictures download, that you were, tense, nervous or fighting with a loved one shortly before or after some of each pictures. If you have children, what do you think that they’ll remember the most? The fake, forced, or real smile that they gave and that you gave at that event, or the argument and tension that occurred before, during or after that event.

Life, as grand as we think it is, is simply the essence of many little moments.

What are those moments for you?

Perhaps it’s important to analyze this now, when you still have time to change them. Your energy affects the energy of others. Remember that. Most importantly, your essence, which is what you egotistically refer to as your life, will remain in the lives of those whom most love you and were most interested in taking important pictures with you. What memories are you truly creating for them? What memories are you creating for yourself? Based on that, if indeed, your life flashes before you, at the end of your life:

Will you feel that it was a life well lived and one which you loved?
Will you feel that it was a life that was “okay”?
Will you feel that it was a life that you wished you would have done things a little (or a lot) differently?

Think about that every day and live your life with that awareness. Try to not procrastinate to make your life better… make it better now… for you and for those that you most love and treasure.

It’s Your Turn to Share Your Treasures With Us

After you’ve done the picture download activity? What do you think your photos show or not show about your life? What is one thing that you’ll now so that the pictures that you’re taking (based on the life you’re living) are worth the end-of-your-life picture reel?

The Three Profound and Impactful Ways Relationships End

There are three ways that relationships end. There are the:

Relationships that we ended
Relationships that someone else ended and informed us of
Relationships that ended God knows why

Each of these categories has it’s challenges, but there is one that is more difficult and traumatizing for you than the rest? Do you know which one I’m talking about? Read this article and see if your guess is correct.

The Pros and Cons of Relationships that We End

Although it is counterintuitive, one of the most difficult behavioral patterns that we can have is being in tune with what we want out of life and what we’re not willing to tolerate anymore. This metacognition or self-awareness is wonderful in and of itself, after all, knowledge is power, right? But there are definitely pros and cons.

Pros: Knowing that a relationship no longer suits us requires, or actually demands, that we do something about this change. If we’re negatively being affected by someone, it’s important that we speak up and talk to them about how we’re feeling. This poses a great amount of vulnerability because we don’t know if they are actually going to comply with our requests and honor our feelings or not. If they do, it’s great if we’re satisfied. If they don’t comply, then it’s one more reason to end the relationship sooner versus later. However, we must offer them an adequate amount of time to make the change. As tough as it may seem, this usually requires less than a month, at most a few months. It does not require a year or years as some people (especially women, unfortunately) think.

Our goal in any relationship isn’t to give an infinite amount of “chances” to people, it’s to be invested enough in it that you feel the love from the other person and can easily make the daily decision to love them.

Cons: When people don’t honor our needs even after we have spoken to them about it, as painful as it is, it’s necessary to say good-bye. How you do it is up to you. How you should do it is with conviction, love for yourself and compassion (or love) for the other person.

The Pros and Cons of Relationships that Others End

Being on the receiving end of an ended relationship is super difficult. Thankfully, we experience these endings sparingly in life.

Pros: When someone ends a relationship, we can be mature enough to either ask for a reconsideration, if we know that we have what it takes to make the relationship better. Or, we can accept that it’s time for the relationship to end. This awareness of the dissolution of a relationship is much easier when the other person is considerate enough to tell you why the relationship failed with conviction, love and compassion at least and tact and grace as a bonus. It’s never ever “good enough” to end a relationship via a “have a good life,” “see ya never” type of text, email, social media message or phone answering system message. Both people need to have the opportunity to express themselves. And when you’re told why they’re ending a relationship with you, hopefully it’s done with more tact than “I’m fed up with you.” Because abrupt statements such as these, if they had never been this rude with you before can startle you. Hard as you may try you can’t process what it is that just happened. But you are willing to close the book and call it a day. Not out of want… but you’re just in so much shock and pain… that you’re literally not thinking on your feet, because by that point, you’re on your knees– because they hit you behind the knees with their out-of-the-blue statement.

Cons: When you’re “informed” that someone wants to end a relationship with you, you ache, because either your heart is really invested or your ego is really hurt. You wonder, “What the hell? I gave my all to this relationship… and they no longer want to be part of it?” And then you start the pity party with yourself… the “I must not be good enough” thoughts come marching in by the hundreds. Time will perhaps be your greatest ally in recovering. But you know what else will be super helpful for you? Knowing that the other person wanted to end the relationship with you. It wasn’t the greatest thing someone has ever told you, but at least you know.

The Pros and Cons of Relationships that End God Knows Why

Perhaps by now you’ve caught on to the point that the relationships that hurt the most aren’t the ones in which someone tells you that they no longer want to see you. They also aren’t the ones when you have to muster up the courage to tell someone that you want out of a relationship (although of course those can be hard). It’s the relationships that leave you with the thought of “Wait, what just happened? Can sommmmmebody please tell me what just happened.” These are the relationships that are “magical” negatively speaking. These disappear out of thin air.

Cons: Since we’ve been talking about the cons, let’s flip the pros/cons sequence and talk about the cons first. When a relationship that you didn’t really value evaporates, you can live with it after a while. When a relationship that you DO really value does a Houdini on you… you are pretty much literally traumatized for life. And really, we’re all a bunch of traumatized people thanks to this one way that someone escaped out of our lives. Out of our embrace. Out of care. Out of our love. Think about it… how often do you tell someone “see ya”? Sometimes you may confess that you’re a goner, but honestly, you have played Houdini and escaped out of someone’s life, haven’t you? How many times has someone said “hasta la vista” to you? It depends on what you’re like and what people you’ve allowed to enter in your life. Lastly, how many people have come in and out of your life “seamlessly” without leaving a trace? I’m assuming it’s more than the first two, right? Why? People have trouble hurting other people. They rather shut their mouth than state the truth and see someone shut their eyes and cry. They rather shut people out suddenly, than be there to bless someone, and give an “I understand this is tough” hand squeeze. We’re all perpetrators of this.

Pros: Having experienced a loss that we question time and time again, year after year why it ended is difficult, but in its own weird way, it’s a blessing. “But why?” you might be asking. Simply put, it keeps us human. Our egos don’t get super inflated to the point that we think that we’re irreplaceable. This in turn makes us more compassionate because we know that moving forward and after analyzing this third category of how relationships end that most likely you hadn’t verbalized or really thought about (other than being obsessed with wanting to know why the relationship ended)… you are much less likely to disappear out of someone’s life, without saying good-bye. Think about it, when someone dies, and they disappear suddenly out of our life, one of our greatest torments that you have is “I never got to say good-bye.” So in a death of a relationship, it’s super important to allow yourself and the other person to bring closure to that relationship. It’s the most humane way of moving on. I know that there are poets and writers who say that some people that come into your life either fall off a tree like leaves or exit the train of your life like regular passengers on a train. I have an issue with that for one simple reason. While I know that life normally has a “natural” way of working out, who is to say that the person that you most want to get rid of isn’t the person that who has the capability of loving you the most? Of course you have to use your own judgement, your own expectations for your life, but you also need to use your fairness. Be tactfully open about why you no longer want to speak to someone as soon as you can verbalize it. That way, people can also have the same opportunity to do what you’re doing and that is, to move on. In the end, this is beneficial for you too, because you won’t feel as guilty as you would if you just left with absolutely no explanation. (By the way, why do you think you feel guilty when you do this?) If there is one thing you should remember it’s the good ol’ Golden Rule… don’t do unto others as you would not like them to do to you. Typically knowledge is power. When it comes to relationships, knowledge is love.

Share Your Wisdom With Us

Which relationship closure is the most painful for you? Why?

If you want to help prevent the perpetuation of “traumatized” individuals going about their day to make this world a better place, half-present and absent-mindedly, share this article with those that you believe in can help bring closure to a relationship the right way.

What is the One Thing that is Sabotaging your Life and What You Can Do to Eliminate It

I first became acquainted with Iyanla Vanzant when she first came out on Oprah. Something that struck me about her then and that continues to strike me now, is the loving manner in which she tells it like it is. She invites you to reflect about your life as a sister would… with love and compassion, but truly encouraging you to live a life that allows you to be better and freer. In other words, she has very little tolerance for B.S. and she inspires you to have very little tolerance for your own B.S..

What Is Our Biggest Issue with Forgiveness?

While living a better and a freer life can sound like a cliche or a generality, Iyanla’s book, Forgiveness: 21 Days to Forgive Everyone and Everything, is a flashing, bright, neon, symbolic sign (which many of us can’t see or simply ignore) of what many of us need— to forgive— in order to live unchained to our past and little by little, untether ourself from our issues. Think about it, what usually holds you back? Fear that you’ll get hurt if so and so does such and such to you. Put another way, you’re afraid that you’ll taste humiliation again, and you’re afraid because you dislike the taste of humiliation (who likes it?) within your own body. And who controls what goes on in our own body? We do. The act(s) you lived through that you think is/are so horrendous happened in the past, but you continue to relive it/them in the present. It’s like watching the scariest movie scene that “traumatized” you over and over again, instead of focusing your attention elsewhere. Who does that? As incomprehensible as it might be, we do. Why? Because at some subconscious or conscious level, revisiting these undesirable episodes in our life and rehashing them to the people in our life and the new people that we meet works for us.

You willingly let fear paralyze you because you would rather be be paralyzed than be hurt.

Paralysis, isn’t as painful as hurt. As you’ve probably experienced, many times, after we’ve been hurt, we build a wall around us SOOOO high that we prevent others from entering our lives and sadly, those people who WANT to be in our lives hardly ever are “out to get us.” Sadder still, those people who love us dearly, hardly ever get a chance to truly enjoy us… because we’re so adamant about keeping these walls up and we have a super annoying laser-focus on how we’ve been hurt in the past (rather than an appreciative focus on the present) that we can’t fully experience the love that surrounds us. But hey, I understand, shifts happen, and even the people who love us, hurt us from time to time. Being close to someone poses that “danger.” Think about it this way, just because there are traffic signs that warn us and help us maneuver our way on a physical road, doesn’t mean that there won’t be mistakes and/or accidents along the way. Likewise, knowing that the people who love us don’t typically want to hurt us, doesn’t mean that they won’t. They could misread our signals (especially the yield, stop and go signs), get the signs mixed up, be stuck in traffic in their own life and have their own issues to deal with. Their reaction to you is not always just about you... they have a life, too, you know? 😉 Plus, nobody’s perfect. Even you’re not perfect with yourself. And honestly, sometimes you don’t show (not demand from) the world how you would like to be treated. Think about it, we say we love ourselves, but sometimes, we hurt our own selves. Two of the many ways that we do that is by not forgiving ourselves and forgiving others. Believe it or not, there are things that we have to forgive that we’ve done to ourselves. Do you consider yourself your worst critic? You see? That’s what I mean!? When it comes to forgiving others, please, don’t use the phrase, “I’ve been working on forgiving so and so for (x number) of years” and think that the higher the number the more heroic your efforts. If you haven’t forgiven someone it’s because you don’t want to. Forgiveness doesn’t require years of constant effort, because it’s a decision. And a decision can be made in a small amount of time… often in an instant. As the book Forgivenessshows, though, there are many areas of our life that need healing, and we may have some blockages along the way, but 21 days should be, and is, more than enough time to forgive… especially when you consider that the person who most benefits from the act of forgiveness, is you.

What Can the book Forgiveness Teach Me?

Thankfully, this book, Forgiveness, teaches us how to use self-reflection, journaling, honesty in answering Iyanla’s questions, EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique), Iyanla’s guided meditations, forgiveness scripts and our willingness to focus on something other than our past and our wounds to move forward. In other words, we can learn to acknowledge our pain, and our hurt, but we need to move forward. Otherwise, we’re just scratching the wound and it’ll never heal. And really, isn’t that sad! and literally painful?

Working on Forgiveness Is a Gift that Keeps on Giving

As if the gift of forgiveness wasn’t enough, this book is a gift that keeps on giving. If you know Iyanla, you will have noticed that she is generous and so is her publisher, Hay House. For that reason. It shouldn’t surprise you to know that you can get bonuses with the purchase of this book. They can be found by visiting the following link: http://promos.hayhouse.com/vanzant/120313email/ This book stands on it’s own, but the resources make the book even more vivid and applicable.

Does EFT Work?

Now, in order to address what is perhaps your biggest question: does EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) work? It does work if YOU do the work. You have to commit to doing it and do it as often as needed. And there are other things that work as well of course. If you are experiencing blocks in love, work, relationships, health, mental wellbeing and in your finances, you need to take proactive action, but you also have to forgive. Many times, forgiveness, is the first step to moving ahead in life, but we’re often so conditioned to take action, think positively and/or accept our reality as “status quo” that it doesn’t occur to us to forgive. After all, we’re also encouraged to compartmentalize the way that we live and to separate the good, or in this case the so-so, from the bad. You think… “I haven’t forgiven _____, but that can’t possibly have anything to do with why my income is less than it once was.” But as this book teaches us, things that don’t seem to have a connection do. And forgiveness and lack of thereof, has a huge connection to our blocks, sabotages and in life.

What Does it Take to Forgive?

Forgiveness requires a high degree of self-love because it necessitates that you have enough compassion to not necessarily let someone else off the hook for what they did, but to let YOURSELF off the hook for letting that incident happen to you, for not removing yourself from the situation sooner, for making a decision that you could’t exactly know would yield an undesired result, stop thinking that you have to avenge or keep score of any misdoings and continuing to believe that you have to be affected by the negative incident(s). You have to especially let yourself off the hook by not punishing yourself and stop believing that due to what’s happened to you, that you can’t or shouldn’t be happy.

Happiness should be what redeems you from your hurt and your pains.

Asking you to be happy may seem like an impossibility, but look at it this way, since you can’t change the past (although I KNOW you wish you could), what would make all your suffering “worth it”? Being happy, right? Meaning if you had to go through that tough time, the least you can expect/wish for is going through a really good time now. Of course, you can (and should) learn from and be wiser thanks to your past hurts (because yep, as hard as it is to accept, or as cliche as it may seem, everything DOES in fact happen for a GOOD reason). As Oprah and Maya Angelou have said, “when someone teaches you who they are, believe them.” So be wiser with whom you allow to be a guest in your life. Don’t justify their misdoings for them and don’t stop listening to your intuition just because you feel sorry for them. Apply this to yourself as well… if you don’t want to be the victim of a situation, make sure that your mentality is not that of a victim. Don’t fall into the trap that “it’s better to be the victim than the perpetrator” just because it’s more socially acceptable to be the former instead of the latter. Don’t retell your sad stories to the world over and over again just because you want other people’s empathy. You know what society loves even more than victims? Heroes of their own story that inspire others to live THEIR life fully. In sum, it comes down to one question: Are you going to continue being a victim and publicly lick your own wounds forever or are you going to use your voice to speak your truth, to state your dreams and to take your stance?

I received this book for free from Hay House for review purposes.

Now It’s Your Turn

If you’re really up for it, I’d love for you to take the opportunity to answer this question:

Are you going to continue being a victim and publicly lick your own wounds forever or are you going to use your voice to speak your truth, to state your dreams and to take your stance?

If the above question is a little TMI (too much information) for you to answer right now, please answer these questions:

What is your best advice for forgiving? What has the process of either forgiving or being forgiven taught you?

Please share your responses with us. This is the type of topic that matters and can really inspire us to move forward in life and simultaneously, move life forward.

What is the BEST time to Request, Assist and Expect Miracles?: The book Miracles Now Has the Answers

Gabby’s siteDespite our best intentions, many of us don’t have the time to meditate and we therefore think that we don’t have the spiritual practice that we desire, or worse yet, we don’t have the spiritual practice that we think we “should” have. For that reason, using a book like Gabrielle Bernstein’s April 2014 book, Miracles Now: 108 Life-Changing Tools for Less Stress, More Flow, and Finding Your True Purpose is a great resource for living a more conscious life. What makes this book truly unique is that it not only breaks down spirituality in digestible, actionable chunks for the mere mortal, but it also teaches us spiritual practices that are not usually found in mainstream daily meditation books. Miracles Now is based on Kundalini yoga and meditation, which is different than what we may be used to when it comes to both meditation and spirtuality, but it’s super interesting and effective.

What is the Value of Miracles Now?

Miracles Now is a book that presents you with 108 spiritual practices that include mantras, meditation poses and mental shifts that remind you in your busy, hectic, often stressful daily life to live from a place of love rather than from a place of fear. As you know, it’s not enough to say that you’re going to live from a place of love without doing anything to perpetuate the love, and without doing anything to eliminate the fear-laden trip-ups that we are exposed to and unwillingly, although sometimes willingly, expose ourselves to. As the subtitle of the book indicates, this book really does help you diminish your stress, live in more flow and continuously be on the path for finding your true purpose. This book, like Gabby’s prior books, is highly influenced by her study of A Course in Miracles (ACIM). In ACIM, it says that miracles are simply a shift of perception… specifically what this means is that miracles naturally occur when we shift pour perception from a horizontal point of view, to a vertical point of view, thus referencing a Higher Power.

What is One of My Favorite and Inadvertent Practices that Resulted from Reading Miracles Now?

I’ve always loved reading with a Kindle, Amazon’s e-reader. (By the way, if you haven’t tried reading with the Kindle because you feel that you won’t enjoy a book as much simply because its not in print form, I recommend that you do try reading with a Kindle because the experience is so great, you’ll hardly miss the paper. And if you don’t want to buy a Kindle, you can actually download a Kindle app for your app devices or simply download the Kindle Cloud Reader on your computer, so you can read electronic books from any computer with internet access). This book, Miracles Now was perfect for reading on a Kindle because each of the 108 practices is so to-the-point, that sharing them on Twitter is a joy. Not only was it a pleasure to share this wisdom with others, but having an opportunity to review these reminders in my own social media account was a breath of fresh air. Sharing this wisdom, makes me feel proud because we all can use reminders for how to live more mindfully.

What I Personally Thought of Miracles Now

I’ve read Gabby’s prior books, and done the May Cause Miracles: 40 Day Meditation Challenge, which by the way, I was super proud that I was able to do. However, this newer book, Miracles Now is my favorite. It’s almost like having super delicious spiritual “tapas”/appetizers which seem small… but which leave a huge, lasting and peace-infused impact on my life. With so many things competing for our attention, nowadays, making spirituality practical, is the best way for us to feel that our spirituality and our life align. Why? Because spirituality is much more than listening or reading, it’s about applying it on a day-to-day basis and growing daily because of it.

What’s In It for You?

We all can improve our spiritual practice… at the very least, we can all increase our feeling of connection and especially, our feeling of peace. When you buy Miracles Now, you’ll be able to work on these areas. Additionally, if you so choose, you can participate in the Miracles Now Book Club Power Posse by checking out Gabby’s site . And if you like to get a bonus or a gift from time to time for your purchases, you can even obtain free goodies by visiting http://gabbyb.tv/miracles .

Share Your Wisdom

Given this article, how likely are you to read Miracles Now? How do you think or wish that this book can help you?

The reason I was able to review this book is because I received this book for free for review purposes.

5 Short and Simple Reasons Why Breastfeeding is Better than Formula

When you’re pregnant, and you want the best start for your child, it’s impossible for you not to at least consider breastfeeding. Perhaps you’ve always known that you wanted to breastfeed your baby, or perhaps, you decide to do so after you do your research. Yet no book, blog or word of mouth advice can accurately depict how satisfying and biologically and emotionally beneficial it is for your baby to breastfeed. If you need further clarity about why breastfeeding is better than formula, it’ll be easier once you are holding your baby and can tell with all your six senses what feeding option your baby deserves.

5 Reasons You Should Breastfeed

1. Breastmilk is beneficial for the baby

Nature created no better nourishment for your baby than breastmilk. The commitment that breastfeeding requires isn’t necessarily easy, but it’s so worth it. If you haven’t seen a side-by-side comparison of the nutrients present in breastmilk compared to the nutrients in formula and the important role that these nutrients play in your baby’s development, you’re in for a very eye-opening treat. 🙂 The simple verdict?

Breastmilk contains more than 100 nutrients that formula can’t replicate.

2. Bonding

Breastfeeding allows you to bond with your baby like nothing else. What better love can you give your child than to willingly give of yourself (literally)?

3. Milk AvailabilityIf you’ve seen people carrying diaper bags or diaper backpacks nowadays, you know that going out with a baby requires packing everything but the kitchen sink. All kidding aside, most diaper bags are bulkier and weigh more than the baby itself. No kidding! While you can choose to pack a couple of bottles of frozen/thawed milk to give your baby while you’re driving, you don’t have to pack milk at all if you don’t want to because you always have milk with you. No measuring or mixing required. 😉

4. IQ
Studies show that babies who are breastfed, generally speaking have a 4 point higher IQ than those who babies who weren’t breastfed.

5. Savings
The fact that you can save hundreds of dollars by breastfeeding your baby is just the icing on the cake. All the other reasons for breastfeeding are great enough already. When you breastfeed your baby, you don’t waste time, money or energy driving to the store to buy milk, and as long as there is a demand for breastmilk, and your baby breastfeeds, you never run out.

You Decide

So there you have it, 5 short and simple reasons why breastfeeding is better than formula. Ultimately, it’s every mother’s choice as to what nourishment they wish to provide for their child.

I have been breastfeeding for over a year and I intend to continue breastfeeding longer. I have greatly enjoyed breastfeeding although it is a huge commitment simply. What have I gotten it from breastfeeding? Just the simple satisfaction to know that I’m providing the best baby nourishment there is. What has the baby gotten from breastfeeding? The baby has been, is and will continue to benefit greatly for the baby’s entire life. Aside from my time and my love, breastfeeding is one of the best gifts that I can give my child. You can do the same thing for yours. It’s your choice, for your child’s benefit.

Share Your Wisdom Tokens With Us

Have you observed any of the benefits of breastfeeding either with your children or children that you know in action? How did you decide to feed your children and what influenced your decision? I’d love to hear from them in the comments below. If you liked this article, and know of a soon-to-be or new-mom who is already short on time, send them this short article.

What Nobody Told Me About Motherhood, But Wish They Had

No matter how much we prepare for motherhood, there isn’t any book that prepares us for the nitty-gritty details that can surprise us in a good way or in a bad way when the baby arrives. We are told that parenthood will be the ride of our life, but we don’t know the exactly what the ups, downs, twists, turns, bumps, surprises, backups, or altitudes will be until we start the journey. We wonder, “Are we equipped with everything we’ll need or will we need to make stops along the way to ask for directions?” The great news is that the baby will be your life tour guide in more ways than one.

What Motherhood Taught Me Out in the Field

Motherhood taught me:

That I would get 1 or 2 hours per day of sleep for the first few of months.

That the other waking hours of my day during approximately the first year would primarily consist of breastfeeding.

That maternity leave would require more effort than a 40 hour work week vs. a 22-24 hour day (but that even then, motherhood would be much more gratifying).

That people would want to visit our family (or rather our baby) more than they had in their entire life.

That taking a shower would be a luxury.

That going to the bathroom would be a luxury which wouldn’t be as private as it used to be.

That eating a meal uninterrupted, would be an impossibility for years to come (unless you ate when the baby was asleep, yet even then the baby would most likely awake when you were about to take your first bite. (You know, that bite that traditionally, people seem to enjoy the most 😉 ).

That going to my favorite restaurant would become a rare occurrence.

That staying at home would be much easier than going out.

That it’s easier to carry your baby by wearing him or her, than by carrying the baby stroller all over the place.

That it would be months before I went out alone again. And that when I finally did, I would feel guilty about it.

That I would miss my son even those times that I should have been thankful to have to myself because he has already become such a huge part of me.

That it’s much more rewarding to be attached to your child than to look for a baby sitter.

That my tolerance for embarrassment would increase.

That I could and wanted to drink this much water.

That checking one thing off of my to do list a day, would be such a huge accomplishment.

That I would be so inspired and energized to accomplish many of the goals that I had put in the back burner, because if you can be a great mother, you can do anything.

That all your other accomplishments would become pale in comparison to being a mother.

That my baby’s smile would be the best smile I had ever seen.

That I would grow more patient that I already am.

That I could love this much.

That I would be so blessed by the baby showers I received during pregnancy.

That co-creating and nurturing a life would be so rewarding.

That I would be so blessed no matter what else was going on.

Even though nobody told me about these things, in retrospect, I see them as little and sometimes huge “aha moments” and daily surprises all rolled into one that I didn’t mind discovering on my own. After all, there’s no better job training for how to be a mother, than motherhood itself. And there’s also no other jobs which such satisfying perks. Motherhood may not be unicorns and rainbows, but unquestionably, motherhood is the closest thing to it and thr most beautiful.

Share Your Wisdom Treasures With Us

So it’s now your turn to share your unique and purposeful experience:

What have you learned about motherhood that nobody told you about?
Do you think it’s better to be fully informed about motherhood, or to have some surprises along the way.

If you’d like, you may want to share this email with expecting mothers. Or, we can prefer to let them enjoy the ride of motherhood in their own self-paced journey. After all, they will soon have a little guide that will share with them the meaningful ins and outs of life.

5 Points Husbands Can Score 72 Hours After The Baby Is Born

Yes, we know that there are tired fathers in delivery rooms.

It’s hard to hold your wife’s hand, tell her that it’s gonna be okay, and to push. Right? 😉 Well, maybe.

But usually it’s external factors that make soon-to-be fathers tired, like the hours that go by waiting for the little one to be born. So yeah, it’s possible that you, as a soon-to-be father, are stressed, but one thing you can bet more money on than you’ve ever been able to in your life, is that the soon-to-be mom is WAaaaaAAAAay more tired than you are.

So having said that, let’s focus our attention on where it really matters: your wife and your baby.

Top 5 Tips to REALLY Take Care of Your New Family from Day 1

1. Get Your NEW Priorities Straight.

We’ve all heard of cavemen.

When you think of a caveman, do you ever imagine him sleeping?

No, right?

So if men are supposedly much more advanced than your historic counterparts, what makes you think that you should sleep more than your wife does that first day?

No excuse that you come up with is good enough, so don’t waste your time even trying to come up with one.

And while we’re on the topic of sleeping… you know that blanket that your wife packed for the hospital after she washed it with her favorite fabric softener?

It’s for her, not for you.

She needs it to be able to sleep as comfortable as possible, for at least tonight, after her efforts in the delivery room, knowing that she’ll have to put in a lot of effort into the sleepless nights that are to come.

2. Hold Yourself Accountable.

If your wife gave birth in any hospital, pay attention to the paperwork you signed, especially the one that you were asked to sign the first day, which says that you (or an adult that’s there with her) need to keep an eye on your wife as she’s feeding the baby to make sure that she doesn’t fall asleep while she’s holding him/her because yes sir, she really can be THAT tired and an extra pair of eyes is highly recommended. Trust me, you don’t want an accident to happen on your watch.

Plus, those ears of yours that hear the baby when it wakes up and wants to be held are more useful now than ever. Don’t wait for your wife to wake up from her sleep in order for you to continue sleeping. It’s your baby, too.
3. Remember Your Role.

Remember, you’re the knight in shining armor and your task is to protect your family unit and shoo and shield away anybody and anything that drains your wife’s energy.

How do you know what does?

Communicate with her flawlessly, listen to her and comply with her requests.

4. Help Her Eat.

Yes, we know that typically you eat more than your wife.

But if she’s breastfeeding, she’ll need about 500 extra calories a day to produce enough milk, so for the sake of your baby’s nourishment, let her eat in peace as best you can.

She literally, and more than ever, needs to eat to replenish herself.

Even more than during the pregnancy, she is eating for two.

5. Become a Mind Reader. (Even if it’s for the 1st Time In Your Life).

Yep, you heard that one right.

Read your wife’s mind to the best of your ability and be as in tune as possible to what she may need.

Challenge yourself to anticipate as many of her needs as you can.

After all, you’ve probably known her for years, right?

And you probably read a parenting book or two that warns you of how much more you’ll have to help your wife which listed for you the specific ways in which you can help.

So don’t think that your wife doesn’t know that you KNOW what to help her with.

And if for some strange reason you haven’t read any book and your baby is on the way any minute now, just know that helping your wife, isn’t rocket science.

Ask yourself:

What do you think she wants that she doesn’t even have enough energy to ask you to do?
How can you come up with answers to such a “hard and vague” question?
- EASY! Put yourself in her shoes. If YOU just gave birth, what would YOU want your partner to do for you?

Focusing on her needs as she takes care of the baby will be THE best way for you to let her know that you support her during this newly embarked journey called parenthood.

Which by the way, lasts a lifetime.

Just saying.

What Your Support Boils Down To

Be sure to at least take 50% of her every-day responsibilities that you can do (even if you’ve never done them before) off her plate and do them for her.

She is by design, already giving much more to the baby than you ever will be able to. (Read that again if you need to, let it sink in).

If she thought you were sexy doing laundry, you will blow her away if you do at least these 5 tips for being a good husband and father. You’ll earn points, for later, if you know what I mean. 😉 (But give her time).
To wrap up, your wife feels an immense need and desire to take care of the baby.

During those first few hours, give her the gratification of being the mother she has dreamed of being for years by taking care of her during this time when she really DOES need you to step up and be the best man you’ve EVER been, because she is being the best woman she’s ever been for the child you were blessed to have.

Share Your Wisdom Tokens With Us

Regardless of whether you’re a wife or a fellow dad, do you have any other suggestions for new fathers?

If you found this article useful, share the 5 Points Husbands Can Score 72 Hours After The Baby Is Born with other couples you know. We never know what “good” we can do in the world by helping someone contribute to allowing the best moments in life to flow as smoothly as possible.