Do you ever wonder what your greatest legacy will be when you are no longer here?
Will your greatest contribution for your family be your:
- your great recipes,
- a book,
- your money/inheritance,
- your fine china,
- your jewelry
- your home or
- your life insurance?
Even though you are kindly thinking of leaving these things behind for your loved ones, the fact is, none of these things are enough. Even if these items are worth billions of dollars, if you just leave them that, it still won’t suffice.
Imagine The Scene After You Leave Society
Imagine your loved ones at your wake/funeral/ash dispersal or the week after you pass.
- What will they think about?
- What will they remember you for?
- What will they talk about?
Will they say,
- “I remember that my ____ (you) loved this fine china?
Or will they say,
- I remember how my mom (or you) loved me.
Do you know what they’ll think about?
How you made them feel. Perhaps they’ll cut you some slack and try to remember the positive things about you instead of the negative things about you, but if you have been mostly mean to them, then, your contribution in their life will continue to be negative.
Do you know what they’ll remember about you?
The “small” things about you, which were actually the large and grand and unique things about you. Like: your smile, the way you hugged, the sound of your footsteps, your caress, what you did when you got home, what you did when you were nervous, the funniest moment that they lived with you, the best thing you did for them, what they thought about you when they first met you vs. what they thought about you until recently, how you listened to them, how you helped them with a problem, the best surprise you gave them, the most meaningful thing you gave them.
Do you know what they’ll talk about?
Your overall experience with you. So make their experience with you a good and loving one.
You Are More Important Than Things
Although it’s super obvious that you will not be physically around your loved ones when you pass, you will leave part of your emotional essence with them. (Some believe, that you can opt to be spiritually around your loved ones when you pass.)
Nothing, I repeat, no thing that you leave them with will be enough. The best you can leave them with is your love. That’s your ultimate essence.
“Your most personal, inherent, meaningful, valuable and precious possession that you can contribute to your family and friends both now and when you’re no longer alive, is your loving essence, that will live on for as long as they do. -Haydee Montemayor
Your love is what’s important, not your stuff or the sacrifices that you make in the pursuit of stuff. Your love will be the most memorable for them for the rest of their life long after the china breaks, the inheritance runs out, or your work/product/invention becomes irrelevant to the rest of the world.
Love is Truly Everlasting
You can forget the things, the details and the events that you’ve experienced with others, but you can never forget their love. -Haydee Montemayor
- you no longer see someone
- when love isn’t mutual
- or when you’re in a relationship that is no longer right for either or both of you.
Love, from those that you consider the worst person or the best person, is still a gift. Love from the worst person is perhaps not your ideal gift, but ultimately, it’s their best attempt at giving you love. That is something super hard to remember, especially when you feel that you’ve given them a lot of love that hasn’t been reciprocated in the way that you expected. In a way, what you resent the most is not that they didn’t love you in the way that you wanted them to, rather, you resent the fact that your think your EXPERIENCE in life would have been so much better if they would have interacted more positively with you. And perhaps your overall life experience would have been more positive. But you know what? You wouldn’t be who you are now. And who you are right now, right this second, is exactly who you need to be in order for you to continue to develop and evolve.
Focusing on How You Can Make Your Love Contribution Positively Everlasting
But once again, the best we can do today, instead of judging the love that we receive is to stop analyzing them and analyze this question instead:
- Are you giving the type of love that you want to be remembered by?
Think about some examples of people in your own life.
- Which person in your life who has passed away do you remember most?
If you need help, I suggest that you take a look at step 5 from one of my prior articles that you can find by clicking on http://loveandtreasure.com/7-impactful-steps-for-talking-about-love-in-a-real-way/ .
In my experience, it’s somebody who loved me best and the most. Quality does matter, but in a world that’s already congested with so many things that are competing for our attention like technology, dreams, ambitions, to-do lists, cell phones and social media, it’s important that you love often so that you can always be on someone’s mind. Quantity seems to be becoming more and more important. And if you are loving with lots of quality and on a regular basis, if you were to go tomorrow, it’s you that they’d miss, not your things and not a relationship that unfortunately didn’t have the time to flourish into everything that it could be.
So, What Is Your Greatest Contribution to Society?
Undeniably, your love. For all the reasons already mentioned and more. In order to help you remember this and plan your life accordingly, I’ve created a Love and Treasure This Moment of Introspection- What is Your Greatest Contribution to Society? PDF for you that has questions that are slightly different than the ones that you saw on this post to get you thinking even more about how your love can be your greatest legacy.
Should Your Contribution to Society Be Only Love?
Of course not. The point of this post was to make you realize that love will be your greatest contribution to society. However, make your whole life a contribution to society. Live with a focus of “How may I serve?” Make the most responsible decisions you can make. Treat people like you love them, don’t just say you do. Identify your other values and live according to them as well.
Furthermore, regardless of how much or how little stuff you think you have, get your financial paperwork in order. Talk to your attorney to see if having any of the following suggestions are suitable for you. If so:
- Have a will
- Have a revokable living trust
- Make sure that all of your financial assets have the beneficiaries that you want
- If you have children, and if something were to happen to you and your spouse indicate whom you would want to be financially responsible and raise your children.
If you don’t have an attorney, and would like to speak with a firm that has been working on legal issues for more than 40 years, and is a member of the Better Business Bureau, you can see if Legal Shield, which has personal plans for as little as $20.00 a month is a good fit for you. You can find out more information by visiting, http://www.legalshield.com/legalshield-plans/personal-plans/ . I’m not affiliated with them, I simply think they’re a good, ethical and affordable resource.
I realize it’s uncomfortable to think about these matters, but you’ll have greater peace of mind knowing that you took care of what nobody likes to deal with out of love for your family.
Time to Share Your Wisdom Tokens
I don’t know about you, but honestly, writing this article made me become quite introspective and sad, even. Particularly, because, I, like you, have relationships in my life that aren’t perfect. Relationships, that as I just said, have not flourished into everything that they can be.
The key here is for me, and most likely for you, is to double check once more if these relationships can blossom, or if they can’t.
If I think they can, I can work on them. If I think they can’t, I need to peacefully let them go and focus on the ones that I can work on. Plus, I know I’m already blessed to have great relationships that I can foster even more.
Remember, our goal in life isn’t to focus on what we don’t have, but rather on what we do have and be appreciative of that. Can we try to be better and do more? Of course, but love should always be at the core of what we do. Not only love for those we want to love, but also, love for ourselves. Love should also be at the core of everything regarding to your family, your friendships, your work and your interactions with society as a whole. Why? Because, that simply is, your greatest contribution.
So now it’s your turn. In the comments below:
- Tell us, are you living the type of love that you want to be remembered by?
- Or if you prefer not to be as vulnerable, answer this question: What type of love do you want to remember by?
- Describe the love that you remember the most, by those living and those who have passed away.